20 Something Girl

Never call a guy that you’ve just started dating, “just to say hey”. Stop. No one likes that. He doesn’t need to know how boring you are, yet. If you don’t have anything awesome to say, put the phone down.

1. When changing lanes while driving, use your freakin’ signal! It’s not optional!!

2. Ladies, please don’t wear white underwear with thin black leggings. I’m begging you. You’re better than that.

3. Calling yourself ‘H.B.I.C’ or a ‘boss’ in a non-ironic fashion doesn’t make it true. It makes you look sad.

4. Being polite is everything. Try it. You’ll like it.

5. Be kind to your parents. Unless they screwed up your childhood, in which place fuck ‘em.

6. Guys, Valentine’s Day matters.

7. Being an adult is all about the willingness to  say “I don’t know” and “I’m sorry”. A lot.

8. As cheesy as it sounds, the greatest love of all is ACTUALLY inside of you. Trust me. I’ve done the proper research.

9. Chivalry isn’t dead. I just saw his ass at The Grove. He’s really overweight and was sweating a lot, but still very much alive.

10. You are complete, beautiful, and perfect. Not as perfect as Ryan Gosling, but you’re still pretty damn awesome.